How do you solve a problem like Maria ?

Pip bears an uncanny resemblance to Connie Fisher. Connie, you'll understand, was the girl chosen by that creep ALW to star in a new production of the SOM.

Andrew (If there's a labour government elected this time, I'm leaving the country forever) Lloyd-Webber said many fine words at the time of selection about the type of candidate he would be looking for.

We know now, of course, Connie Fisher has been a complete triumph in her role, the critics falling over themselves apparently creating eulogies of praise.

Pip has a musical career of her own going on you could say is equally successful in its own way.

As a child she plonked away on a piano to about grade 5 but gave this up, and the violin incidently, because of insensitive comments from a rather thoughtless music teacher. I could smack him !

Until last May, therefore, and a chance to meet up at the Shrubbery Hotel Ilminster,

she hadn't sang or played since childhood.

In a small room, surrounded by other small rooms, I played "Blowing in the wind" Pip sang timorusely and without courage. She picked up my left-handed Seagull and picked out the tune roughly. She was hooked !

Within a week, Pip had got hold of a right-handed horrible Lorenzo finger cutter and had hired a music teacher.

She's not looked back.

A top quality Ovation (American built) followed shortly. She's taken singing lessons and is now looking to start a band away from Rock and Roll Renegades called Les Bitches or something equally hateful.

She sings Shania songs with gusto and does Martina with passion and energy. "He thinks I'm pretty, He thinks I'm smart" etc

And fair play to her. What a real life heroine. (and she's pretty and she's smart)

JVIP

Authors Footnote

Curiously, the person in the next door room at The Shrubbery, way back in May 2006, complained the people next door had a small animal in the room with them and it was howling all night. Whether this puppy-like performance was, as a direct result of a woman learning to sing or, maybe, a woman making love like a goddess should remain a subject for descretion.

Andrew's words (at the time of Connie's selection) run true, however.

``We need somebody who sings beautifully, a lovely mezzo-soprano voice that is extremely stretching,'' he said. ``She needs to be able to act like a dream as well.''

He should have added "Howling like a puppy is highly desireable too"